It wasn’t a large diner, but then are they ever? There might be 14 tables then the bar. I had just gotten up from my table and walked the bill up to the cash register. These are the best places. The small places. These places where they know your name, know what you’re going to drink, even when to expect you. There are no surprises here. I know what they will be serving and I know the people who are going to be there.
I look back at the booth where Jenny is. What A life we’ve had. I remember back to when we were dating. All the great times we had. We were high school sweethearts. How often does that happen? I remember prom. I drove my dad’s ’57 Chevy. It was two-tone black and white. Not that candy-apple red you always see now. It had matching two-tone vinyl interior and a backseat the size of a motor home. Her blonde hair looked like golden fibers against it. My dad spent years restoring the car and that was the first time he ever let me drive it. That night as I stared into her blue eyes she told me that no one had ever made her feel like I did, and I told her that I felt the same. Later the same night she gave me her pendant necklace and from that moment on I knew we would be together forever.
When we danced it was magic. Sometimes everything around us seemed to move so fast, and others everything was completely still. Only she and I existed. We were alone on the dance floor with nothing except the music in our ears.
I took her to the coast that summer. We spent the days in the ocean, the evening dining and drinking, and the nights in the shore where the water met the land. She said that my love was like how the water collapsed over her and was able to caress and touch every part of her body at once.
“Hey there blue-eyes, how are we today?” Carol asked shaking me from my memory.
“Doing great Carol.” I replied. “Really great.” And I handed her my bill and a twenty.
She began pushing buttons and I turned back to the booth and little Andrew was back. He was 4 years old now. I could see myself every time I looked in his eyes. Sure he didn’t look much like me; he got most of his facial features from his mother. He is the most beautiful child I have ever seen with his multi-brown-toned highlighted hair and eyes as dark as the coffee in my cup. I guess I might be a little Bias. He’s a great kid though. You take him out to eat and he’s always so good, listens to his mom and doesn’t ever whine or complain. He even says please and thank you to the waitress.
“So how was your meal today?” Carol asked.
“Great as always Carol.”
“Any plans for today?”
I looked back at the booth.
“No, just kind of laid back I think.” I said with a smile growing across my face.
I turned back to Carol as she handed me my change. I shoved the few fives and ones into my pocket keeping the odd change and some ones in my other hand to leave as a tip.
I set the tip down on the table and when I looked up John was sitting next to Jenny with his arm around her. His long auburn hair and beard, so perfect, so different. He wore khakis to breakfast on Saturdays. He didn’t fit, not here. He leaned over and gave Jenny a kiss on the cheek and Andrew screwed up his face thinking it was gross.
I stumbled over a chair leg as my attention was focused on the booth across the way. An older couple passed by the booth and I heard the woman comment on how Andrew looked just like his father. My brow furrowed and I reached the door.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.” I said as I pushed open the door to leave. No one responded.
I crossed the street to my car and opened the door. I leaned on the top of the car and looked back into the diner. I could still see Jenny as she laughed. This was not how it ended. Not her with him. It wasn’t supposed to be their kid; he was supposed to be ours, Jenny and mine. I slowly slid down into the car where my exposed skin almost instantly stuck to the vinyl seat s in the car and I closed the door. I sat there in silence for a moment watching the sunlight reflect from the triangular charm hanging from the mirror, the one she gave me when she told me that she loved me, that she would be with me forever. I started the car. I turned the dials on the a.m. radio until I found a station playing music, trying not to be too obsessive. I didn’t have to obsess though, not this time. Most people anymore only know Otis for Sitting on the Dock of the Bay, but not the a.m. I sat back in the seat leaning against the headrest as
end.
Chapter 3
25th, December 2012
In the blackness of the darkened night a glow appeared in the night. It was a glow that could be seen around the world, like the star of
From in the twisting crimson, grey clouds the angels came forth. The only thing darker than the night was their wings. They swooped to the earth like vultures at their pray. Blood seemed to be more plentiful than water. The angelic figures would swoop at the people and even if they missed they would rose up with blood dripping soil.
And then I saw him. The pale complexion and black eyes, black hair, dressed in a black gown that seemed to leave a trail behind him. He flew overhead as though he were supervising the whole ordeal. He then slowly descended to the ground and stood right in the foreground of the view. At that the sky grew even darker. The red glow disappeared , the shadows fell to nothing and the angels went out of view. They were still there, but could not be seen through the darkness. Then the earth began to tremble like the beginning of an earthquake and the ground opened up. From behind the soft glow of the face of the one angel, the only thing I could still see, a pair of eyes opened and glowed a dark yellow light.
In the shock of seeing it all again, and actually remembering it Stephen was jolted from his sleep. That feeling in his gut was worse than ever and the sweat seemed to pool in his bed.
"You still don't believe." a voice from the darkness said.
Stephen jumped up in his bed. He stood there, just as he did in the alley. Stephen rubbed his eyes, thinking he might still be dreaming.
"Come Stephen, I have something to show you."
"What makes you think I'm going anywhere with you?"
"I don't think you have much of a choice."
The next thing Stephen knew he was standing in front of St. Christopher's Church. It was an old mid-evil church set in the oldest part of
"You don't seem to understand Stephen. This world is not as it seems. Not this world, nor the world you humans seem to think you know. It sometimes seems to me that you people never even really thought about it at all. All the information in your bible proves so much, yet you seem to disregard anything you don't want to hear. The war in Heaven alone should have been enough for you."
"Should have been enough for us to what?"
"To see that God isn't perfect, that he isn't the omniscient, omnipotent being you all treasure him to be. That he isn't all that merciful. You seemed to see that yourself Stephen. Would an all merciful God destroy the earth and all it's being in such a violent and miserable way?
You are a historian, a theologian. I'm sure you've read 'The Confessions'. did you ever notice the number of times Thomas Aquinas writes how you were put here just to worship Him? Doesn't that seem conceited to you? Just a bit? He's as human as you are, in a sense. He lives, He makes faults, He thinks of himself, He can be killed - if you get to Him."
"What's that mean? If you can get to him?"
"No worry." He motioned his hand towards the church, "Shall we?"
The church was dark, lit only by the candles of the offering and the sacristy candle that hung a good thirty feet above the floor. the candle light contrasted the pasty walls from the dark wood of the floor and pews. The old church still had the three old alters from years past up against the walls. Those were the time Latin was still used, a gate separated the congregation from the priest, those were now gone. The gate had been gone for years, and in fact, it was quite odd to still see the three old alters still up. Most churches had disposed of them years ago. Each alter held a life size statue of a different saint. One was of
"I've got to say, this is a shock, even from you. I always kind of thought this was the one place we were all safe from you. Kind of a forbidden place for evil ones."
"Come now Stephen, I'm not all that bad. And besides, you should know nowhere is off limits for my kind. This place though, this is my kind of place. Dark, cold, a man hanging in torture. It's nice, don't you think?"
Stephen looked over at the crucifix. That same image that two days ago brought so much comfort, now almost scared him.
"So what are we doing here? I'm sure it was more than to tell me how much you enjoy the decor."
"Just turn around."
As he turned around the offering candles flared into a blaze. On the pews he saw shadows of men and women, even some children. Most just sat there, still, some where holding each other as if consoling one another.
"Wha...what are they?"
"Quite possibly the worst thing that can happen. These are the people who, I guess you could say, wish they were in hell. Not originally of course. But now, yes. These people wish they hadn't had faith at all when they were alive. They are the lost souls. People who died and when they arrived at their destination were so disappointed they were cursed to this place. This place for the disappointed soul. Where they will sit for the rest of their days. But not just in here Stephen, but in all the churches in all the world.
They sat here every Sunday praying to their God, living good and decent lives, waiting for what they thought would be there for them. Now, they are condemned to stay here for eternity. A pity, huh? Punished for having the wrong idea."
Stephen could see them squirming in their seats. He could feel the tears from the ones holding each other. The torture of their memories, how they had held this belief of greatness all their lives, now destroyed. That hope thy looked for every day, just waiting for comfort, that never came.
"What is this? Why are you showing this to me?"
"Doesn't seem so merciful now does He?
He just couldn't take it when Lucifer began to rise. He feared a revolution, so was condemned. Not that we complain about the underworld, it's just the point of the whole thing."
"So what? Are you trying to get me to believe that God isn't all powerful? Who is then, Satan?"
"No, not at all. But he is no less powerful than God. Maybe even more. I don't know. You people don't seem to give Satan his due. Take the Jews for example. After the Holocaust they began to doubt the validity, or the mercifulness of God anyway, because they were thought to be the people of God. But after they were mass murdered they found it cruel. How could God do that to His own people? They never stopped to think that Satan could get to one person and create so much damage. This is where God loses His omniscient powers. He know not what Lucifer is going to do, or is doing until it takes place, until it changes something."
"Hitler was possessed?"
"No, he was just persuaded very strongly towards Lucifer's wants. You humans are very easy to convince. Hitler was just an amazing man, and Satan found him. It had nothing to do with God or God's great plan. It had to do with Lucifer and Lucifer alone."
Stephen was still staring at the pews, at the shadows squirming in the seats.
"And them?" Stephen asked of the lost souls.
"That is God and God alone. Satan had nothing to do with them. I'm sure each was tempted at some time or other, but no more than every other man. This was all God's doing."
Stephen stood there in disbelief. He couldn't believe what was being told to him, what he was being shown. Could God really do this? Might God not be everything we have always thought him to be? Or have we? Ancient civilizations didn't view gods as immortal or perfect. Could all this be true?
The angel could feel the doubt in Stephen. He could tell that it was beginning and he like that. It was the beginning of what needed to be.
"Nothing is as it seems Stephen. Nothing."
Stephen looked back at the pews once again. The shadows overwhelmed him, he couldn't get past them. Disappointed souls...punished for having the wrong idea...Put here just to worship God...Feared a revolution...condemned. It could all be. After all, we know nothing about the afterlife, the spirit world.
Stephens mind went back to that single question we all have had at one time or another, why? Why was all this happening, and why is it happening to me?
He could feel Stephens hesitations. He could see the thoughts.
"Care to see any more?"